Gene -- very disturbing post to us because everyone here loves - and has an almost spiritual relationship -- with purple martins. Not putting the housing back up just would not be an option for me.
I'd sincerely try to talk it out, but not sure I like the idea of another tree -- a life-long reminder. All that sun now...offer to make a wildflower garden or to plant rose bushes. I hope you can work things out over time and not hold resentments, but get those martin houses up. John
Sadly, I guess I won't have any martins this year........
-
Guest
Gene,
I think Bernie has an excellent idea if you are interested in harvesting the fruit. If you are not, then the dwarf variety of trees are extra effort. In that case I too think you would do well to plant native trees. Perhaps you could select native fruiting shrubs that would attract birds but not grow to a height that would bother the martins. You will want to double check this, but I think that hummers will nest in very dense shrubs if they have adequate protection from predators.
In regard to the hummers, I would recommend that you purchase a number of nice hummer feeders and erect something near the deck or windows where they can be observed from inside. Our hummer feeders are right on our deck and on our kitchen windows. The hummers don't mind us at all. It is a lot of fun to observe them really up close and this might let your wife see them like never before. With a little effort people have even gotten hummers to drink sugar water from their hand by placing a bright flower bloom there to attract them. You will be amazed how you can stand right in the middle of them and how they will buzz around you going from one feeder to another. Put of multiple feeders since hummers can be very territorial.
Good luck!!!
Jeff
I think Bernie has an excellent idea if you are interested in harvesting the fruit. If you are not, then the dwarf variety of trees are extra effort. In that case I too think you would do well to plant native trees. Perhaps you could select native fruiting shrubs that would attract birds but not grow to a height that would bother the martins. You will want to double check this, but I think that hummers will nest in very dense shrubs if they have adequate protection from predators.
In regard to the hummers, I would recommend that you purchase a number of nice hummer feeders and erect something near the deck or windows where they can be observed from inside. Our hummer feeders are right on our deck and on our kitchen windows. The hummers don't mind us at all. It is a lot of fun to observe them really up close and this might let your wife see them like never before. With a little effort people have even gotten hummers to drink sugar water from their hand by placing a bright flower bloom there to attract them. You will be amazed how you can stand right in the middle of them and how they will buzz around you going from one feeder to another. Put of multiple feeders since hummers can be very territorial.
Good luck!!!
Jeff
-
Guest
Get a real big and nice weeping cherry tree. The do not grow fast at all and have many limbs to sit on My hummers line up to sit on mine waiting for turns at the feeders. In my neck of the woods it will cost a pretty penny but it will be worth it.
-
KathyF
- Posts: 3522
- Joined: Thu May 24, 2007 1:57 pm
- Location: Missouri/Licking
- Martin Colony History: Colony started - 2007 with one pair
As of 2018 - 84 cavities offered, max # of pairs hosted - 82.
Gene,
I had up 3 hummingbird feeders last year and had over 22 hummers....and only a sparse amount of oak trees on the sides of the house for them to land in. She's not going to lose her hummers because you cut down the tree.
I'm not much of a "diamonds" girl, so I have to go with the "down on your knees" apology & beg for forgiveness crowd and then plant a nice, new cherry tree (or several) as a surprise for her- on the OTHER side of the house from your PM setups, then put up your gourds & houses.
It was clearly a problem with communication between man and wife
- and now her feelings are hurt. 
So, do your penance (quickly!) and she'll forgive.
Rule #1 with wives: Check, double-check, confirm in triplicate, with a copy mailed to yourself and one to her, just in case.
I had up 3 hummingbird feeders last year and had over 22 hummers....and only a sparse amount of oak trees on the sides of the house for them to land in. She's not going to lose her hummers because you cut down the tree.
I'm not much of a "diamonds" girl, so I have to go with the "down on your knees" apology & beg for forgiveness crowd and then plant a nice, new cherry tree (or several) as a surprise for her- on the OTHER side of the house from your PM setups, then put up your gourds & houses.
It was clearly a problem with communication between man and wife
- and now her feelings are hurt. So, do your penance (quickly!) and she'll forgive.
Rule #1 with wives: Check, double-check, confirm in triplicate, with a copy mailed to yourself and one to her, just in case.
"Sometimes", said Pooh, "the smallest things take up the most room in your heart."
2023 - 82 pair
2022 - 80 pair
2021 - 75 pair
2020 - 78 pair
2019 - 80 pair
http://kathyfreeze.blogspot.com
2023 - 82 pair
2022 - 80 pair
2021 - 75 pair
2020 - 78 pair
2019 - 80 pair
http://kathyfreeze.blogspot.com
-
birdy girl
- Posts: 1179
- Joined: Wed Apr 19, 2006 9:09 am
- Location: Mississippi/Dumas
Take her out to a wonderful dinner, plant lots of blooming flowers, and if possible plant 2 cherry trees in an area away from your martin site. Plant apple, pear, and plum trees if necessary if you have the space. Help with the housework for 6 months or longer if necessary. Heck, being a woman I could go on and on with things you could do in order to put up your martins poles.
Gene,
I feel SO sorry for you! If your wife is anything like my husband, who says stuff that he doesn't mean when he gets angry. just give her some time to cool off, she'll change her mind. She is probably just feeling so angry that her hummingbirds will miss that tree and she wants to make you feel just as bad as she does. And, it's working too, isn't it?
On the other hand, if she doesn't back down on her ultimatum after a week of you being a REALLY REALLY penitent, sweet-talking I'll-do-anything-for-you kind of guy, then you've really got a problem.
By the way, I don't agree with the get-her-another-tree idea. I know if it was me it would just remind me of the tree that you cut down (and you really don't want another tree there anyway, do you?). I think you should buy her some hummingbird feeders and some shepherds hooks to put them on along with a HALLMARK card that says how sorry you are (unless of course you can write your own poetry).
Or you could just do what I do - be as nice as you can and walk around looking really, really sad - oh, and sigh a lot! Good luck.
Jeanne
I feel SO sorry for you! If your wife is anything like my husband, who says stuff that he doesn't mean when he gets angry. just give her some time to cool off, she'll change her mind. She is probably just feeling so angry that her hummingbirds will miss that tree and she wants to make you feel just as bad as she does. And, it's working too, isn't it?
On the other hand, if she doesn't back down on her ultimatum after a week of you being a REALLY REALLY penitent, sweet-talking I'll-do-anything-for-you kind of guy, then you've really got a problem.
By the way, I don't agree with the get-her-another-tree idea. I know if it was me it would just remind me of the tree that you cut down (and you really don't want another tree there anyway, do you?). I think you should buy her some hummingbird feeders and some shepherds hooks to put them on along with a HALLMARK card that says how sorry you are (unless of course you can write your own poetry).
Or you could just do what I do - be as nice as you can and walk around looking really, really sad - oh, and sigh a lot! Good luck.
Jeanne
"Look at the birds in the sky. They do not sow or reap, yet your heavenly Father feeds them."
Did they produced cherries? If not tell you you are going to plant one that will product the biggest sweets and juiciest cherries. Tell her you got a couple of Ranier cherries trees on order. Tell her it was going to be a suprise. It will take them 10 years to grow 30' get dwarf and they won't go over 15 foot with the same wonderful cherries that now you can eat!
-
Guest
Show your better half the concern (all these helpful posts)we all have for her and you and the Martin's
dick
dick
-
geneinmurphy
- Posts: 348
- Joined: Thu Nov 27, 2003 12:09 pm
- Location: North Carolina/Murphy
RC...the wild cherry has small dark berries (roughly 3/16" diameter) which the birds love to eat when they turn black, but not for human consumption. I took my wife's best friend's advice and to break the ice offered to buy/plant another tree close to where the other one was. None of the nurseries carry the wild cherry tree because they consider it a "junk tree" and can only get them from the wild locally. The local nursery guy recommended maybe a flowering cherry, weeping cherry, plum, redbud, and crete myrtle trees. We're going out tomorrow to look at some when my wife gets off from work. Hopefully this will work out so that I can put up my gourds soon.......I'll let you guys know how it goes.....
-
Guest
Hey Gene,
Had a couple more ideas. You buy packages that have all different bushes and flowers that attract hummingbirds and butterflies. I also like the hummers and feed them as long as they are here. They were my Dads favorite.
You can also take some of that cherry wood and mix it with hickory and cook her some fine bar-b-q. It is an outstanding cooking wood.
All kidding aside I hope yall work out the problem to both of your satisfactions. Enjoy the martins and the hummers together.
Waiting impatiently in Checotah,
Had a couple more ideas. You buy packages that have all different bushes and flowers that attract hummingbirds and butterflies. I also like the hummers and feed them as long as they are here. They were my Dads favorite.
You can also take some of that cherry wood and mix it with hickory and cook her some fine bar-b-q. It is an outstanding cooking wood.
All kidding aside I hope yall work out the problem to both of your satisfactions. Enjoy the martins and the hummers together.
Waiting impatiently in Checotah,
Gene, try to make amends very quickly. Martins are already arrivng at a few sites in Dalton. Apologize sincerely and offer to plant anything she wants where ever she wants. (After all, it will take even a wild cherry a few years to grow back to 30 feet.) Best wishes for a truce.
-
geneinmurphy
- Posts: 348
- Joined: Thu Nov 27, 2003 12:09 pm
- Location: North Carolina/Murphy
will be in this area soon. Hopefully she'll pick out a tree today in order to calm her down and hopefully proceed afterwards to raise my gourds right afterwards. This is my eighth year as a landlord and something's "got to give" soon......I just can't visualize being without my purple babies...
-
Guest
Hello Gene Sorry about the situation with the cherry tree, but marriage is not a 50 50 deal. In my opinion it is a 100%/100% deal. Ask for fogiveness and get on with life. Jon 
-
Guest
geneinmurphy,
You should have known better. Husbands are suppose to "read between the lines" and "read her mind". There is only one thing to do now. Forget the diamonds and cherry tree. Go out and cut down the pine tree,and put up your gourds. Do all of this after being very specific and stating to her your exact intentions. Then see what happens
You should have known better. Husbands are suppose to "read between the lines" and "read her mind". There is only one thing to do now. Forget the diamonds and cherry tree. Go out and cut down the pine tree,and put up your gourds. Do all of this after being very specific and stating to her your exact intentions. Then see what happens
-
geneinmurphy
- Posts: 348
- Joined: Thu Nov 27, 2003 12:09 pm
- Location: North Carolina/Murphy
nursery with me late this afternoon after work and picked out a 7' redbud tree to plant in the yard. Her friend called her on the cell phone while we were eating out after getting the tree and mentioned to my wife that the martins are coming soon and we need to get the gourds up soon. My wife mentioned this to me when she got off the phone and I replied thaat they were indeed with 75 miles of us per the PMCA reports. She said...........................you better get busy and put them up! Eheh.......Busy day tomorrow...........I guess next time before I do anything major in the yard I better bounce it off her first. Thanks for all your spport and suggestions, folks!!!!!!!!!
-
The Olsons
- Posts: 3200
- Joined: Mon Feb 12, 2007 12:57 pm
- Location: North Padre Island, TX
geneinmurphy,
Congratulations that you get to put up your housing Great news...Happy Ending....Best wishes for this martin season 
Astrid
Congratulations that you get to put up your housing
Great news...Happy Ending....Best wishes for this martin season Astrid
Love it or leave it~~~Astrid :-)
-
Guest
Great news, Gene. The redbud tree is a personal favorite of mine. Your wife will love the heart-shaped leaves and tiny purple flowers. It's pretty slow growing also, so it shouldn't be a concern as far as martins go for another 30 years or so. 
-
Tim Mangan-Kansas
- Posts: 1728
- Joined: Wed Mar 15, 2006 7:25 am
- Location: Kansas, Pittsburg
- Martin Colony History: 2016 - 22 Pair
Phew, that was a close one. Another marriage saved thanks to the PMCA (Public Marriage Counseling Association)
Tim
Tim
Licensed Bander
2015 - 14 Pair - fledged 68
2014 - Moved to Kansas - 7 Pair, 35 eggs, 28 fledged in first year
2010 Thru 2013 - Moved-Tried to start new colony
2009 - 46 pair, 217 eggs, 178 fledged
2015 - 14 Pair - fledged 68
2014 - Moved to Kansas - 7 Pair, 35 eggs, 28 fledged in first year
2010 Thru 2013 - Moved-Tried to start new colony
2009 - 46 pair, 217 eggs, 178 fledged